Some ponderings on blogging..

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about writing and blogging. During the rehab course I’m currently taking part in, we’ve been discussing things that we used to do before we got sick, but no longer do (but would want to). My first thought was writing. Before I got sick I completed two manuscripts for novels, but that’s as far as it ever got. I also have plans for several more. I’d really love to get back into writing.

It’s difficult though. When you’re tired all the time. But I’d really want to get started on writing again. One thought I’m having is to start a second blog where I could post stories. They’re shorter than books, so maybe there would be less pressure. And even if no one would read them, it’d feel like I’m at least putting something out there, rather than letting them gather dust in a closet somewhere. (Or virtual closet, as it were, since I write on the PC.)

Just need to figure out a nice name for a blog like that though… It could be for posting the stories, but also a bit of writing about every day life and writing in itself.

Another thought I’ve been having about blogging, is to quit my World of Warcraft blog. While I still enjoy playing the game, I’m losing interest in raiding since it’s a bit more stressful than I feel I can easily deal with. Combined with lack of people and slow progress.. I just don’t feel like raiding is giving me any enjoyment these days. Which also means I don’t feel I have much to write about. How can I write a guide about how to play your class in WoW when I can’t even keep up with the current progress myself? So, that’s something I’m considering. Just closing up shop on that blog (and hopefully writing more stories instead!)

A final thought regarding writing and reading and all is something that popped into my head after I started reading THE BOSS. It’s a novel by Abigail Barnette, which she’s publishing a new chapter ever week on the web for free. It got me thinking about the “pay what you like” model, and wondering if it wouldn’t be cool if there was a site out there for authors to put their works. Sort of like Jenny is doing, but a site where it’s all in one place. Where readers can read the stories, and if they want – pay for them.

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Movie: The Movie

I discovered this, and felt that I just had to share it. For the Oscars this year as well as last year Jimmy Kimmel made a trailer for a non-existing film, that contained all the usual cliches. They’re just awesome. I love movies, and you just recognise all these stereotypes.. so much fun!

The first one has an insane amount of celebrities in it. The second has less, but I love the bashing of movies like Twilight. I can’t help myself.

Release the Tatum!!

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Still alive!

I’m still alive, I promise! More or less at least.

Thursday had me completely wrecked though. They took us out for a walk, and I can normally walk for about 20 minutes before I’m in considerable pain. We were out walking for two hours. Needless to day, the rest of the day was not fantastic. By evening I was in so much pain that I could barely move. Friday was a bad day as well, still in pain and having a quick bout of cold. Sore throat, coughing, fever… I don’t know if it was related to the pain, but it was not fun having it all at once!

Today I’m finally starting to be able to move again without wincing, so at least things are going in the right direction. Tomorrow it’s back to the grind though, so I’m very much hoping for a more relaxed day, because I don’t know if I can handle another day like Thursday.

So… Hmm… Updates. Weekend was spent… In bed mainly. So to be honest, I have absolutely nothing interesting to report whatsoever. I will return another day!

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Where’d time go?

Okay, so suddenly it’s… I don’t even want to count. A lot of days later. The rehabilitation thing I’m doing is draining all my energy and I pretty much come home in the afternoon and crash for a few hours.

I’m four weeks in now, starting week five tomorrow. So nearly half way. I have to admit though, that while I’m not going to quit, but see it through… I don’t really see how this will help me.

Sure, the physiotherapy bits are nice. Always useful. The relaxation exercises are okay as well. But this Mindfulness thing… I don’t know. I just don’t think it’s for me. The first time we had it, they handed everyone a raisin and then asked us to feel it. Touch it. Roll it around our fingers. Smell it. Listen to it.

Yes. You read that right. They asked us to listen to a raisin.

I get the idea that Mindfulness is about being in the here and now. But really, listen to a raisin? All I could think about was where the candid camera was.

Then there’s the “art” bits. Where they most often tell us a word and we have to make something, either from clay or on paper, that we think of. Usually in very little time. Or when we had do draw a rug with colours for all the things we did in a day.

I realise that they want you to have some sort of “A-ha!” moment. Some self-realisation or something. But I’m not. I already know that I’m tired and that my days are filled with not doing much, but worrying about all the things I wanted to do or feel I should do. I’m not learning anything I don’t already know.

Painting a picture about how tired I am doesn’t make me less tired. Really.

As I said, the physiotherapy is quite okay. Except when they over-do it. I can do a bit, but if I do too much my fibromyalgia acts up and I end up having a lot of pain. Last week they took us outside and had us walking around for hour and a half. By the end I wasn’t sure I was going to make it back to the hospital, I was in so much pain.

Which I find odd. They’ve had these courses before. Most of the people there suffer from long-term pain. Why is it they can’t figure out that a 90 minute walk may not be the best idea?

Sorry for all the whining. I just needed to vent a little.

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I thought we were reviewing movies?

So, there’s this review in The Observer of the movie Identity Thief, written by Rex Reed. In this review he makes a lot of comments about actress Melissa McCarthy, calling her “humongous”, “tractor-sized” and a “hippo” (among other things).

I find this rather deplorable. If he doesn’t like the movie, that’s fine. If he doesn’t like her acting, that’s fine too. But to start talking only about her size in such a derogatory way, that just doesn’t seem to fit in a movie review. Isn’t a movie review supposed to be about… I don’t know… the movie? The actors’ performances seem like a fair thing to take a shot at as well. Not their size or looks though. That’s below the belt, and quite honestly irrelevant for the review.

It also makes you think. Because I can’t remember ever reading a review about a heavier male comedian that focuses mainly on their size and how disgusting the reviewer finds them. Can you imagine someone writing the same things about John Goodman, Jonah Hill or Zach Galifianakis?

Galifianakis

Galifianakis

Goodman

Goodman

Hill

Hill

McCarthy

McCarthy

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Wait… Is that…?

We were handed this piece of paper in the rehab the other day. Is it just me (I may be weird), or isn’t the way the man’s shorts are drawn a bit… unfortunate? I specifically mean the front of them…

Is that...? (you can click for a larger image)

Is that…? (you can click for a larger image)

I will admit.. I’m immature enough that I snickered a little bit when I saw it…

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“Art & Form”

The “Art & Form” part of my rehabilitation seems a bit odd. The first time we had it we got  a few seconds only to quickly draw something, the first thing, that came to our minds when we heard a word. Whether it was a colour, an image or nothing at all.

This is my… eh… masterpiece.

So talented!

So talented!

The words are JOY, DANCE, CONFLICT and HAPPINESS.

For JOY I drew my dog Bailey. I wanted to draw Molly as well, but there wasn’t enough time. We really did only have a few seconds. For DANCE I just drew a dancing woman. I personally don’t dance, so it’s not me, more like.. me watching someone else dance. For CONFLICT… well, you can see. When it came to HAPPINESS I didn’t draw anything because my mind went blank. Which I guess is quite sad in a way?

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And so it begins…

It’s been very quiet from me this week since on Monday I started my multimodal rehabilitation, and I’ve been absolutely knackered by the time I get home. What is multimodal rehabilitation you might ask… and I’d have a hard time answering.

From what I understand, it’s approaching the problems on several fronts. The rehabilitation is aimed towards people with long-term pain (such as me with my fibromyalgia) and giving them tools to better handle their day-to-day lives and a possible work situation.

To give you an idea, my schedule incorporates the following “classes”. It’s a combination of theory and physical trianing. (Oh and the names might seem odd, it’s because I’m loosely translating them straight from Swedish.)

Life Balance
I’ve only had this twice so far, and it mainly seems to be discussing how to better plan your day-to-day life and finding ways to accept your situation. Improving your quality of life. At this time it seems a bit “out there”, since one of the times we got to choose a picture from a pile that we felt applied to us and then discussed it. So, yeah.. I hope this will seem more worthwhile later on.

Sleeping School
We only start this next week, so I’m not entirely certain what it involves yet. All I know is that we’re supposed to get hints and help about what we can do to improve our sleeping patterns.

Mindfulness
Something about being “here and now” and not getting too caught up in the past. Having the first one tomorrow, so I don’t exactly know what it is yet.

Walking with staves
You know.. the kind that you use when skiing. Only now you use them when walking.

Colour & Form
This seems a bit odd. I guess it’s about expressing yourself or something? The first lesson we got to draw something in a few seconds by word association.

Body Awareness Training
We’ve had this once so far, and it seems to be about learning to relax and breathe. There was a special kind of massage we got to try out as well, which I have to admit was really nice. I’m usually in so much pain it’s hard for me to receive “regular” massage, but this was just light pressure on your shoulders, and it was quite honestly perfect.

Gym
We have a physiotherapist in the team, and she’s meeting us all individually to create a program for us, then we will be doing that in the gym.

Hand Training
I missed the first lesson in this, so I have no idea. Micro-movement with hands? I don’t know. I just hope it doesn’t involve knitting!

Pool Aerobics
I really enjoy this one. It’s a rehab pool which means the water is extra warm, which is lovely for sore muscles!

Mat Training
We lie on mats on the floor and do various movements, stretching and whatnot. Some movements are very close to (if not the same) as yoga.

Nature Group
Being outside a lot it seems. First time we went for a walk where we were told to be quiet and focus on our breathing. Then we had to walk very slowly, and finally very fast. Part of me wishes the entire course was further into Spring, cause it’s not awesome walking outside in the snow and ice.

I’m not sure yet what I think about the whole thing. At the moment it feels like a lot, but it’s probably just because I’m so very, very tired. Some of the things are quite painful for me, but I hope that as the course continues (it lasts for 10 weeks), that will get better and better.

Part of me just wants to lie in bed and sleep instead *lol*

 

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Instagram

You may have noticed that I’ve updated the widgets on the side of the page to include Instagram. I finally folded to the peer pressure (hah!) and got an account for myself. It’s just a really easy way to upload photos and make them look better than usual. Also, sometimes it seems a bit silly to create an entire blog post just to show off some silly little photo I took.

So, yeah.. if you’re interested you can view my Instagram in the widget or on http://instagram.com/emmie_80/.

Let me know if you have an account as well, since I will totally follow you! (As you can see, I am incredibly active on Instagram and following a horde of people! *cough*)

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Bookaholic

I don’t shop a lot, but when I do it’s more often for books than it is for clothes or other things. Some time ago there was a sale on old Classics, you could get 5 for €10. Obviously I had to buy three sets. (For the attentive; yes, there’s only 14 Classics in the photo. I gave one to a friend.)

Books <3

Books <3

Since I got sick I generally don’t have the attention span or concentration to read things that require… well… a working brain. So I’ve been sticking to romance novels and the occasional Torey Hayden novel. (Which, by the way I recommend! Though they’re not always nice reading since the children she’s worked with in her professional life has had anything but a great life.)

I bought myself a few novels lately anyway, since I discovered that Amazon.co.uk finally offered free shipping to Europe (rather than just UK). All I had to do was order for at least £25… Not an issue! Got myself a few Lisa Kleypas books from a series of hers I’m currently reading, an Eloisa James book and one from Abigail Barnette.

From what I understand the Barnette books are classified as erotic fiction. I don’t really know how I’ll like it – but since I absolutely love her sense of humour and awesome recaps of the 50 Shades of Grey books, I decided to buy something of hers. If for no other reason than to support her. And who knows… it might turn out to be awesome!

I actually tend to buy more books than I can read these days. I used to easily read a book or two a week. Whereas now I’m lucky if I read that much in a month. There have been times when I’ve not read anything for months. Something which is very unlike the pre-getting-sick me.

At this point I probably have around 200 unread books in my bookcase. In the year or so leading up to my burn out I wasn’t reading much, but I was still buying books like before. And I still buy books now, though not as much as I used to. I really need to get cracking on all those books!

Does anyone else have a tendency to sometimes buy books because they “look pretty” or have a “catchy title”? Or is that just me…

I get silly excited about things like my large, Complete Sherlock Holmes book with gilded pages. It’s too large and cumbersome to ever be read easily, but it looks so great! (Which is why I’m also slowly collecting the paperback versions for easier reading.)

And yes, I will pay a little bit more if it means I get a matching set of books from the same author…

For Christmas I got some books from my family. I guess they caught on that I like books, huh?

My brother (and his family) got me a couple of WoW novels.

My brother (and his family) got me a couple of WoW novels.

 

My sister got me the Hunger Games, because she says it's well worth the read.

My sister got me the Hunger Games, because she says it’s well worth the read.

 

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